Blessings............Leslie Wan
Blog Written by Hilary Sherlock (formatted by Leslie Wan)
It
takes a while to adjust to the fact that most of the communication at our school
is non-verbal. Still once you listen with their communication style and see with new eyes, you realize you
are in a language rich environment. Much of their communication is
non-verbal, but very clear when you attune yourself to it. The turn of a head or the stiffening of a little body speaks volumes. I have learned to interpret the
language of the body over the years, and
if you are open, can become very sensitive at reading non-verbal cues. Many times,
it is a matter of us slowing down and waiting for the response, instead of
answering for the child. When I (Hillary)
first began working at S.T.E.P., Andrea (our therapist) said to me – “that is
such a powerful message you are giving!” I was confused at first by the comment
but I soon understood that what she meant was - just waiting
for the child to respond in any way they could, during a lesson, is a way to give
them respect and teach patience, while allowing them to have a voice …
The
surprise of a voice that speaks and what they will say when they decide to, is
a gift they give us. My eyes were opened on a trip to a farm we
took the older children. One of those "a
ha" moments was with a student named Mikey. I always knew that Mikey had
words, but he didn't often use them and when he did they were hard to
decipher. On the bus trip, he chattered the entire time and he commented on every bus and truck that passed us. Interesting that getting
out of the classroom and seeing large transportation beside us, was his
trigger. Really you just never know until the moment it happens, what will be
the catalyst to converse with real passion.
One
thing many people don't realize is how truly verbal some children / teens with
physical challenges are. There is an assumption that because they are poised in
a wheelchair that the rest of their capabilities are wrapped up in that chair
as well. I remember Andrea (our therapist) telling me of
a conversation she had with a child with physical disabilities complaining that
because she couldn't walk, the assumption was that she could not talk either. People seemed to assume she talked with her
legs and could not answer for herself. When
she was out with her siblings, people would ask questions about her, in front
of her (and not always politely.) She lamented that for some reason
the only thing people saw was her chair and assumed her hearing and her speech also
required that chair.
Occasionally,
a child comes along who voices what so many others must have been saying all
along. One little boy with very frail limbs, but a strong mouth – when being moved, would caution us …… “Take time with
me!” Yes, I heard him and I hope we take time with all
our children, time to listen and time to understand from the child’s
perspective. I repeatedly remind our volunteers and workers that our students
despite their challenges should be granted some autonomy and the ability to be
consulted when exploring their care. A volunteer recently tried to put a
tambourine in a student's hand and the teachers advised her that the student
did not have the ability to hold it. She came to me and was saddened that she
may have publicly insulted that child. I listened and then said " yes, she probably could have held the
tambourine and enjoyed it, but the part left out is that no one asked her if
she would like to try." That was a teachable moment for that volunteer and
she appreciated the feedback.
Our
therapies include many methods including the stander. The stander requires students to be strapped in and stand upright with the strength of their legs and
yet supported while doing it. Most of
the children protest when placed in the standing frame or “stander”. Young Dave
was able to voice his objection…..”If yu put me in stander and mi foot a cramp
up, mi nuh mus drop eye water (cry).”
Yes, that is the reality, but we in the effort to strengthen his legs
were busy hushing him knowing it might not be comfortable, but expecting it to
be stoically experienced. They won't
always love what is best for them but they deserve the voice to complain anyway. They
want to get stronger, better and more capable, but the reality is that they
don't always have that capacity, or it is a work in progress. One little boy
would look at us and declare …”Mi tell mi foot to walk, but it nah walk.” His brain fully grasped the concept but his
legs didn't respond. One of our students, Laura, worked out her response to the
well meaning adults who would encourage her to pray so that she would be able
to walk. Her answer, “You know when I
will walk – when Jesus come!” End of
argument! Meaning, that you who really walk beside me, don't grasp that I have the will,
but I get tired of you assuming that I don't give it my best effort and
sometimes God's plan is a mystery.
It is hard not to laugh when speaking with them, though laughter might
not always be appropriate. Recently
while playing a game with two students a volunteer and myself would cheer when either accomplished
the task of matching animals. Big exuberant cheer goes up from us each time.
Next thing we know when he gets another correct he makes a pretend "gun
Salute" and it is us laughing.
Most certainly we should NOT have
laughed but it was so unexpected. Quickly we realize our error and explain that
was not appropriate and we substitute another exuberant gesture (hands up in
the air like a goal score). This same little chap when enjoying a school event
where the teachers dressed as students and performed for the children, declares in true form “mi nuh must laugh after you tun yuself ina
fool.” Sometimes the truth is just
funnier than we imagined.
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| Teaching recycling |
The story of herself(name withheld)written by one of our children with pictures and symbols (cerebral palsy keeps her body moving)
The lesson for us as teachers and also their care givers or parents, is to remember each child's individuality and to realize that their own goals may differ from our own. While we set goals for our children and we strive to achieve those goals, we often must remember that the student has his or her own goals and they may differ from those of both ourselves at the school, and the care givers at home. Many parents express that they have established a goal that their child walk and talk. They want them to be more functionally whole in the world they find themselves in. But we have often heard the children express as their goal, to be able to feed themselves, go to the bathroom themselves and for their communication to be understood in whatever manner they choose to communicate, verbal or non-verbal. That is the point here for all of us, give the children some autonomy, celebrate where they are with a recognition of the future THEY want ,don't assume that their disability defines everything about them, and listen to them even when words are not the method of communication. They ALL tell us things when we watch, listen or accept their communication style.
As Winnie the Pooh said " The things that make me different are the things that make me!
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| Our parents say thanks to our teachers on Teachers Day |
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| Some of our devoted parents and grandparents who came to celebrate our wonderful teachers. |
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you...........
